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LightCon 2020 – Reflections

Hey folks. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I think we can all agree on the strangeness of the past several months. I’ve given myself a lot of grace lately regarding my depression, accepting that unless I’m really, truly upset about something, it primarily manifests as lack of motivation. I’ve had a really frustrating underlying desire to watch a lot of anime that’s been buried beneath an inability to actually click on any streaming services or grab any discs off the shelf. If that sounds maddening to you, well, welcome to the fun that is mental illness – it’s the endless push-and-pull between what you want to do and your inability to do anything about it.

One thing that usually motivates me is the responsibility I have toward multiple anime conventions throughout the year. Having the looming date of an event on the horizon is usually what prompts me to finish up anime that I’ve been watching and to organize my thoughts into something coherent. 2020 has become the year without deadlines; a mass of unmarked time with no big events to serve as signposts in the fog.